Modern self-esteem isn’t perfect for the world. It just takes one unreceived piece of feedback, or a sassy comment to ruin your day fully.
It can take a lot of time and effort to persuade yourself that you’re amazing — so how do we quit allowing people to manipulate the awesomeness to your self-worth with a high kick? So how can we make better use of that?
1. Identify Source
We often take every piece of criticism we hear to heart, no matter where it comes from. Even if you receive mostly positive reviews, all it takes to create doubt is a single negative comment.
There’s a difference from someone you know to receive feedback from a stranger. An anonymous person can criticize because they don’t appreciate what you’re doing, or because they feel good doing it. However, a familiar person who gives advice will generally speak out of concern for your well-being. If the person has had similar experiences, then listening to the information they need to share is worthwhile.
So ask yourself: Does that person have an interest in what I am doing? Are they really interested and well-informed or just someone with an opinion? Filter your message through the sound.
2. Treat Appropriately
You can try convincing others why they’re wrong. You may also show the facts behind your reasoning to them. And yet, it has no impact. Chances are you’ll end up exhausted and irritated.
I recommend that you not take things too seriously, instead. If anyone criticizes you, the person would be thanked for expressing their thoughts. You may also ask them to clarify their point of view, to see what to suggest. Or if the person is a stranger, then you can ignore them and move on.
There will be enough problems, worries, and questions to deal with on your own when you do something that’s just slightly outside the norm. Don’t let any single comment or viewpoint get in your path.
3. Believe that the problem is primarily with them, not you.
Interestingly, feedback is also a representation of an individual who is giving it. Perhaps the person has a bad day, struggles in an area in which you excel, or enjoys being generally contradictory. The person may have chosen you as the target for unleashing their frustrations and impulses.
Emphasis on Your Path Ahead
Consider a road race. Look out for the spectators as you run. Many cheer you on, many remain quiet and some can shout abuse. The spectators will do the same thing, when the next person comes up.
People spent just a fraction of their time what you’re doing. As in the Aesop’s Fable ” The Miller, His Son & The Ass “, the observers who judge you are facing none of the repercussions of their actions.
